Have you ever considered auctioning your home? Maybe it doesn’t sell and you have to get out from under the debt? It seems desperate to me–which, of course, it is. Seems as though you could plan your life a little better than that, but maybe not. You can place a reserve that you won’t sell under (like on eBay), but that has to be reasonable and probably lower than you’d ever dream of getting rid of the house for. You don’t have to sell it for the auction price, but it costs to set up the auction–hiring the auctioneers, advertising, processing the security deposits–so it seems foolish to go through all that if you’re not going to get rid of it.

My neighbor just finished. He lives next door to me, so I sat on my patio, with the promised mint julep despite the 1pm hour, and watched it all. He served hot dogs (which struck me odd because it’s a $1.5 million dollar house–why not wine and cheese, or caviar), soda and chips. A group of about thirty chatted for about 15 minutes until the auctioneer laid out the ground rules. That took 20 minutes. Then it started. They asked for $850,000, but it quickly dropped to $800,000. Then went up, little by little until it sold for $1.225 million. Which, as it turns out, is a fair price for the house. One sold down the street for that.

Oddly, it was exciting, with the typical auctioneer voice and a helper who announced–loudly–each price. I think the new owner feels lucky. Wait’ll he sees what he has to do to live in it. Customized construction inside. A glass block wall in the middle of the living room. Pocket doors into the rooms. Grass on the hillside. Code violations for the building stuff. If he’s planning to raze it, he’s in good shape.

I’m glad it’s over. If you read my earlier blog, this guy was profiled in Orange County Register as a victim of the mortgage crisis. The truth: He had to auction his house because he’s the stereotype of white trash. The Police are there all the time for family problems, neighborhood disturbances, loud parties. It gets worse.  They’ve grabbed his kid for shooting at the FedEx guy in his truck. We’ve begged the authorities–including the homeowners group–to do something about him shooting airsoft guns and beebee guns in the backyard, but it’s too hard to prove. I’ve been scared to death one of the rounds will hit my dogs in my backyard. His first wife poisoned my dog with tainted beef because she said he barked all the time.

Good riddance.

Or should I be careful what I wish for?