Thank you so much, Adrienne (author of The Tenafly Road Series), for inviting me to again participate in this wonderful exploration of families. Last year, I shared how my children inspired most of my writing–
This is a personal how-to on preparing for and applying to the United States Naval Academy. It’s based on my daughter’s experience in high school where she first thought such a selective school was out of her reach and then was accepted into a life-changing activity that would change her forever.
This story comes from time spent with friends of my daughters who served in the Silent Service. It is a story of brain vs. brawn, creative thinking, and the importance of family in our lives, but at its core is patriotism. Many of my ancestors were in the military though I wasn’t, and by the time I started writing this book, both my children were committed to their paths. I respect the patriotism, single-mindedness, and stalwartness of our warriors–this story reflects that.
This story takes place in large part on a US warship, the USS Bunker Hill. This was my daughter’s first ship after graduating from the Naval Academy. She secured amazing access for me during my research to the ship and its people. She put herself way out there to help me. For that, I am forever grateful.
This year, I wanted to share how we stay in touch. My son Sean serves as a SGT in the Army in Okinawa and my daughter Meaghan is a LT CDR in the Navy at Ft. Meade Maryland. My daytime is my son’s nighttime and my daughter is always busy so staying connected would be a challenge if we hadn’t come up with a variety of ways to make it work:
Messenger
This is a free Facebook app which allows free phone calls (video or audio) and texting. That’s free even to Japan and my son and we use it weekly. I also set up a family group for texting so we can share daily thoughts, pictures, or whatever with everyone. My kids love pictures of my Labrador, Casey, so I send what I call the Daily Casey through Messenger.
Google Hangouts
Messenger doesn’t always work so we have the Google Hangouts app on our phones for video chats. It’s more reliable than Messenger with a few more features. I like redundancy in my life.
Google Keep
Google Keep lets us set up lists or short notes that can be shared for not only viewing but editing without involving a full Word doc. You can share videos, images, lists–pretty much anything. Whoever you share it with can edit it on their phone so it often serves for ongoing events. Right now, I’m not using it with my kids but I do share the shopping list with my husband. Another option is Apple’s Notes.
Google Docs
My daughter does a lot of writing in her job and as a growing passion. She still thinks I can help her with editing so shares the docs with me. I love reading her voice, her ideas, in ways I’d never hear otherwise. Through Google Docs, I can share suggestions which she can respond to.
Google Sheets
We use this a lot to plan family trips. Thankfully, my kids are happy to travel with me. Last summer, my son had a month leave from Okinawa so took a 2-week trip with me to visit my daughter (his sister) on the East Coast and my sister (his aunt) in Indiana. We left Indiana via train and took that all the way home to California. We organized everything on Google Sheets–daily schedules, stuff we wanted to do, who was responsible for what. Everything. Since it’s accessible from phones as well as computers, I could check it for daily details also.
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That’s about it. How do you stay in touch with your far-flung family?
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I’m excited to announce the release of my latest prehistoric fiction, The Quest for Home. Click through and check it out!
Jacqui Murray is the author of the popular Building a Midshipman, the story of her daughter’s journey from high school to United States Naval Academy, the Rowe-Delamagente thrillers, and the Man vs. Nature saga. She is also the author/editor of over a hundred books on integrating tech into education, adjunct professor of technology in education, blog webmaster, an Amazon Vine Voice, a columnist for TeachHUB and NEA Today, and a freelance journalist. Look for her next prehistoric fiction, In the Footsteps of Giants, Winter 2021.
Reblogged this on Vijayagiri views.
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🙂
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Messenger is a way to communicate:)
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I like it but I don’t like that it seems to populate with my FB contacts. I really don’t want messages from anyone but family.
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Agree… I use it mostly for family…
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These are great suggestions. Talk about synchronicity–earlier today two friends of mine were discussing FB Messenger for the same reasons you relate above!
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I’m not a FB fan but do appreciate Messenger. Without it, it would cost a fortune to stay in touch with my son.
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Google is definitely your friend! I speak on the phone, or, ideally I do :). I see my siblings once or twice a year – some more, some less. Its amazing to spend time with my nieces and nephews and watch how they become people of their own.
I love how you share. I wonder if the distance means you are sharing more than you would’ve.
Love, light and glitter
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Maybe–sharing more than usual–but my kids are fairly open, even with mom. They allow me to track them with Find My Friends even.
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I’ve never heard of that app, sounds awesome! It actually says a lot about you, about what an amazing mother you’ve been to them. If I ever decide to have kids I’ll know where to get advice.
Love, light and glitter
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Find My Friends I think came with the iPhone and is now merged with Find My Phone. Oddly, I can also find my daughter’s phone and earbuds.
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Pingback: How I Stay in Touch With Far-flung Family — WordDreams… – Prof blog
These are great ideas for staying in touch. You have a lovely family.
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They really work, too. I feel as close (or closer) to my kids than I did in high school.
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Really liked learning how you stay in touch with your family in the military. I had no idea there was Google Keep and Google Sheets, and they sound very useful for planning things. Messenger is my go-to for keeping in touch with others. It almost always works for me but when Wi-Fi reception is patchy, then it doesn’t work at all.
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We have that experience also. Then we bob over to Google Hangouts. Sometimes, that doesn’t work and we give up!
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Hi Jacqui – fascinating to read … loved the tour of technology and finding out a little more about your kids – love the photos. Thanks for the techie ideas – not having kids … life is slightly different – but so be it – I’m in touch and learn from so many. Cheers from a damp south coast – piff to that!! Hilary
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I can only imagine how difficult it was for parents and grandparents when these options weren’t available. I feel close to my son though he’s across the world.
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Thank goodness for technology. Remember letter writing? Seeing our relatives once every year or two? You do a great job of staying in touch, Jacqui, and it’s so fun to see how your children influence your books. 🙂
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I’m not sure if I’d be writing if not for their influence. I didn’t even tell them, just got their permission to use their knowledge in my books. They’re good kids.
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Keeping up with family (especially our adult kids) when they live abroad or on another coast takes ingenuity for sure. I appreciate those tips! I message with a friend occasionally from Hong Kong. I’m still blessed that our kids are on the west coast at least and my daughters often phone me while driving home from work! I am thoroughly enjoying “Quest for Home!!”
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So glad you’re enjoying Quest for Home! I love hearing that. I hope your friends are OK in Hong Kong. Things are really crazy there.
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I think she is already here by now…
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Thank goodness. Their fight is noble, for a democracy China doesn’t practice. Sigh.
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Jacqui,
That’s cool you can stay in touch with your family through these various sources. I’m lucky to get a text or phone call from mine. 🙂
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Well, I follow them on Find my Friends and if I don’t hear from them, I harass them. And then I bribe them. That might be the reason.
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You have found some lovely and innovative ways of staying in touch with your kids, Jacqui. One of the reasons I don’t want to immigrate to New Zealand is the time different. It is 10 hours while the UK is only 1 or 2 depending on the season. Of course, the British history is also a big factor for me.
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Those big time differences are darn confusing. I have to check my weather app to see what time it is there before I call him (it includes the local time).
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Well done Jacqui! It is a common situation nowadays. We tend to rely more on WhatsApp.
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You and Debbie. I really need to check that app out.
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Be careful on FB chat Jacqui. FB copies and listens to all our conversations. Have you tried Whatsapp, it’s much easier than going the FB route. Instant encrypted chat and video calling anyone around the world. I use it whenever I travel. 🙂
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I didn’t know that, Deb. I’ll try it. He doesn’t have an iPhone so can’t do Facetime. Thanks!
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For Whatsapp, you don’t need any specific phone. 🙂
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Lovely and informative piece, Jacqui! You have good reason to be proud. 🙂 I do text with my faraway family but mostly we write via paper and pen or share very long phone calls.
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Letters–oh my. I’m not sure my daughter even owns a roll of stamps and I’m sure my son doesn’t. When I get mail for him here at home, I send him a digital scan of it. That’s all he ever wants!
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Funny–I think my kids are older than yours…:) Take care!
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This was fascinating, Jacqui. I enjoyed learning about your family. I have a Meghan too:) Different spelling.
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Is she about 30? That was a popular name back then…
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She looks about twenty, but she’s actually forty. Hard to figure when I’m still twenty-nine. Ha. And yes, it was quite a popular name.
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Your son looks like you.
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Hehee
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That’s great you have a way to stay in touch with your son in Japan. It can be hard when they are oversees. It was a big problem when my daughter and I were on a tour in China and my texting through my phone service didn’t work.
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Good point! When I went to see my son in Japan, he had a local service (since he lived there) which helped staying in touch with my husband. Otherwise, I would have had your experience. We worried at first about
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Wonderful, Jacqui! Thanks for sharing…
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Fun ways to stay in touch with family. Whatever works, right?
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You bet! Thanks so much for giving me even more options… ❤
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You’re so organized! And you certainly do have far-flung family, don’t you? Only thing farther would be if you had one in space!
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You’ll come up with similar when your kids are launched. It’s hard to be apart.
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I’m sure it will be. Hopefully they won’t go too far (says the only one in her own family to have left Ohio).
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Smart and creative ways of keeping in touch, Jacqui. Hugs to you and yours. ❤
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These are the ways I love technology, in between hating it.
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Really great post. 🙂
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Thanks! I remember college when I always knew they’d be home regularly. Not anymore. We had to get more creative.
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I love your relationship with your children and how that finds its way into your work. Social media sure does offer us a lot choices now. Messenger and Google hang out is our family way to keep in touch. My daughter shares her WIP on google docs with me, too. Although I don’t use to for my work to share.
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I love that, Denise. You know exactly how I feel then.
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I do:)
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Your kids are really attractive, loving, and intelligent – I know where they got those traits. 🙂
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Including Casey, right?
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I almost asked you to give a hug to Casey for me, but didn’t want to deplete the comments about your kids by mentioning Casey – but you know I love him too! I’m still hoping to get a dog but must wait till this house, now falling apart in termite frass and leaky water pipes upon our heads and around our ankles, gets fixed. Ugh!
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Ugh indeed. It’s a constant battle. It makes me wish I’d bought a condo.
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Jacqui, your kids may be at the ends of the earth but you keep them close!
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You know how I feel, don’t you.
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It’s nice to keep in touch with family. Social media has given so many options… FaceTime and WhatsApp are wonderful tools to get in touch instantly.
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I haven’t tried WhatsApp. Have to look into that.
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In my job we also use all of this to connect engineering teams that are working in other areas of the planet. Currently I’m working with teams in Texas, UK, and China.
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It really works well, doesn’t it? What do you use for video calls?
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I loved learning the background behind your books. You must be so proud of your children!
My immediate family all lives close by but for cousins in other states me mostly use email and text to stay in touch. It’s great that there are so many options out there.
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Text has really grown for me. If I send an email, my kids respond in, oh, days. A text, I can harass them until they do. Plus, with Find my Friends, I know if they’re home and then why AREN’T they answering me???
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Social media has certainly helped keep us close to our families, especially when we are all spread out. I use Skype and messenger and so far they have been great!
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I can’t get Skype to work right (who knows why–it works for everyone else?). But with Messenger, I have an alternative. Isn’t it nice to see them?
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My 90-year-old mother just loves it as she can actually see me and see that I am OK. She also thinks it’s magic. xo
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Hehee. There are times I call it black magic, when it really annoys me!
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Isn’t technology fantastic? It makes the globe seem so easily encompassable.
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That is true. Okinawa doesn’t seem so far away. My son will call and we’ll walk around the town, him showing me what’s interesting. All their vending machines! Oh my.
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Wonderful, Jacqui! You have a lovely family. And your ideas are excellent.
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Thanks, Jennie. I am so thankful they want to stay in touch. I miss them less that way.
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I know exactly what you mean! 🙂
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That’s a lot of options.
We usually FaceTime or just use email or text.
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Messenger is our most common, and text. The spreadsheets are for trips. I am lucky they still like traveling with me. We organize it all on a shared doc. My daughter took a trip with another family and kept talking about how poorly organized it was without the Murray spreadsheet!
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It’s great you can stay in touch with free calls over messenger, Jacqui.
Love your Casey!
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Free is wonderful. My kids are all over the world with their orders. I am sad about those who couldn’t stay in touch with these options, before they existed.
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Have you sent these methods to any of the military family sites? I’m sure they’d enjoy closer contact with their children, etc.
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Hadn’t thought of that. Like which ones? I’ll do that.
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I follow a couple, I’ll get you their links!
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Here’s a couple…
https://americanmilitaryfamilymuseum.wordpress.com/about/
https://alaforveterans.wordpress.com/2019/09/09/craft-project-poppy-painting-for-juniors/
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I’m going to try that out. I know it makes a huge difference with my son–that we can stay in touch. And, as a SGT, he sees lots of young men who could probably use that kind of advice. Thanks, GP.
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These are great ideas for staying in touch, Jacqui. What an interesting family you have grown.
Congratulations on your new book – can’t wait to read it. 🙂
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We’re all geeky enough to make it work. Well, there is my husband. A luddite at heart but we drag him along!
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Sometimes that’s just what we have to do. 😁
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You’ve raised wonderful children, Jacqui. You should be proud. I’m happy you have many options to stay in touch. Thanks for sharing!
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It does work nicely. When we talk, I always feel as close as ever, although they are now adults. I have to stuff my mom hat in my pocket at times.
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Very interesting, Jacqui, I like especially your notion of patriotism.
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We all are. I didn’t push it. They got there themselves. Happy about that…
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